Half term activities in 2 Alpes

The Kré bar’s Soiree Sex Toys (dress code SEXY – SEXY, apparently) was possibly the last seriously adult-oriented event we’re going to see for several weeks, and probably a good thing too. The mind boggles. I declined my Facebook invite to that one on the flimsy excuse that I had to go to work the following morning.

Fortunately, resort offers plenty of clean-living apres ski activities for your innocent offspring, even if all they want to do is hang around the video games arcades.

Ice skating is always popular, though personally I can’t see the attraction in sliding around in the cold at the end of the day, as I’m generally back down in resort because I’ve had enough of that sort of thing for one day. If you really must go sliding about in the cold again, the ice gliders are a much more fun option – at least you get to sit down. The rink is turned over to these ice dodgems twice a week, and they’re always a hit. (There’s a joke in there somewhere.)

The swimming pool is another favourite, though I’m told it has suffered a bit in the recent Arctic spell – heated outdoor swimming is all very well when it’s merely a bit parky, but getting wet when it’s -16°C has proved a bit much for even the hardiest souls. Still, the temperature is forecast to rise a bit over the coming few days, so a dip might be an option.

Still on the outdoor activities, Brun Sports at the main Place des 2Alpes has Segways for hire by the hour. I stood and watched a few of these the other day as people wobbled round a line of cones on them, and it looks as though they’re a lot more difficut than you’d think.

If your teens haven’t had enough snow by the end of the day and they’ve been pestering to throw themselves off the huge kickers in the park, let them loose on the big air bag behind the Jandri Express at the Bas des Pistes. There they can launch themselves recklessly into the air with virtually no chance of braining themselves on inconvenient bits of landscape, as the only thing they’re going to land on is a customised bouncy castle.

Smaller and more timid children might appreciate the more traditional attractions of the roundabout outside the main ticket office. This sprouted in the main square last summer, and I fully expected it to go into hibernation over the ski season, but no, it’s still there and going strong. Or going round, at least.

En famille, you can check out the experience of being caught in an avalanche, courtesy of the simulator next to the Jandri Express lift station. I presume they leave out all the parts which involve getting snow down your trousers and subsequently suffocating to death. Or perhaps not – I have to say I’ve never actually seen anyone coming out of there, when I think about it.